A JOB LIKE ANY OTHER
by Connor Nathans
The story of a workplace experience that left one with a lot to learn from
I once worked an office job that was a decidedly menial one, and it could even be, most of the time, overtly menial, though it did, in the end, teach me a lot.
I got the job through responding to an online advertisement, and I was hired to be half of a two-person team. On my first day, I was introduced to my fellow team member, who had been working there for under a year, and I also met another coworker who happened to have been hired for the same job as me. Evidently, though not told to either of us, we two new-hires were, in actuality, in the final stages of the interview process, during which the two of us would unknowingly compete for the one job. This fact of the process was made clear to me the following Monday morning, when my fellow new-hire did not show up for work, and it was made clear to him a few hours earlier that same Monday morning, when he received a phone call telling him he was fired.
After a few months of my being on the job, it so happened that the other half of my two-man team had planned a wedding and, as is customary, honeymoon. Well, a few weeks before this need for a few weeks off, the man was fired, and he was called early enough in the morning that he was able to call me before I got into work that morning myself. I should have quit that morning, and I nearly did, but I did not.
I decided that, if nothing else, I would demand a raise. I immediately went to my boss with my request, but he was too busy to talk that day. My boss was not in the office the next day, but the following day, I repeated my request, and I was told that a meeting would need to be set up to discuss the matter, which could not be done that day. The next time I tried, I managed to schedule the necessary meeting, having been told that a week out would be the earliest available opportunity. The day before the meeting, it had to be rescheduled for a day later, and on that new day, my boss called in sick, but the next day, just after 4:00 pm, the meeting happened.
My demand for a raise was met with disbelief that there could be any reason for it. In particular, to my argument that I was now a single person being asked to do a two-man job, I was answered that management considered it a one-man job. A one-man job? I asked, confusedly. A one-man job, I was answered, confidently. Haven’t two men been doing it? I asked, skeptically. A one-man job, I was answered, confidently. Weren’t three men doing it? I asked, disbelievingly. A one-man job, I was answered, confidently. Couldn’t anything be a one-man job, then, if declaration alone is definition, to the point that every aspect of the known universe might be a one-man job? I asked, laughingly. A one-man job, I was answered, confidently. A one-man job? I asked, incredulously. A one-man job, I was answered, confidently.
Due to its late start time, the meeting had to be under an hour, but in the end, I was given the raise I had asked for, contingent on my doing the full team’s work. As I was the only member of the one-man team, I did not think much of this extra wording, and I considered the matter closed, with myself, after a long fight, being the winner.
It so happened that a new office assistant was hired at this time. Generally, I only saw the woman when I made my way into the greater office are that surrounded my boss’ desk, which was not often, but she and I had a good working relationship. In fact, she took an interest in my work, and because I was now the only person doing my one-man job, she wanted to be able to at least do some of it, should there come a day when I might call in sick or need to leave work early. Eventually, at her insistence, I began regularly passing off to her the most menial of my day’s menial work.
Well, this so happened to be the time when I received my first paycheck after winning for myself a raise. My attention, of course, was on the paycheck, and when it came, I found it to be no altered than it had always been, as if I was still part of the two-man team that had been doing my one-man job. This time, a meeting with management was much easier to obtain, and they were in better moods this time, as well.
To this second meeting, I brought physical proof of my paycheck, in case the evidence of my missing pay was needed. Instead, the meeting opened with my being questioned about whether I had been complying with the contingency of my raise. I quickly answered in the affirmative, but I was immediately questioned on the slice of work I had been training the office assistant in, to which I replied at length, going so far as to attempt to reason with them on the silliness of not considering my one-man job as being one man due to an outsider regularly doing the most menial of that work, which still often required help, in order to train her for emergency purposes while keeping her fresh in what she might be needed to step in and do. The reply to me was short, and it concluded our meeting. I was told that my raise would never be official until its agreed-upon conditions were met.
I did not know what to do other than give up on my raise. I decided that, at the very least, I would have to not help the office assistant the next time she ran into difficulties with the new menial task of hers that had once been my own, and I resolved upon it. I told myself that, if needed, I could explain to her the predicament I was in, and I was sure that she would understand.
The next time in question proved to be the next day. She came to me with the usual issue that she ran into, and she was so expectant of the applying of my usual fix that she walked away from me before realizing that I was telling her why I would not do it. I caught up to her and began explaining my situation, which took some time, and I watched her expression change from uninterest to interest and from basic concern to greatest offence. She stopped me in my words in order to explain how much she needed her job as well as the fact that it had been made clear to her by management that this new menial task of her was considered to be hers, such that she would personally be held responsible for its being done incorrectly. She ended by reiterating how much she needed her job.
I did not know what to do other than to continue explaining my position, but it ended up not mattering, anyway. I had only said enough of this continued explanation to give a sense of it when suddenly, without warning, the woman began to cry. A loud sob started the outpouring, which brought it to the attention of everyone in earshot. Very quickly, then, our discussion gained an audience, with every nearby cubicle featuring a head poking above it. Some who were not in the area at the time, hearing the loud cries, rushed into the room, as well.
Despite the difficulties, I pressed on with saying what I needed to say, but I had no adequate counter to her repeated argument of how much she needed the job. I replied that I, too, very much needed to work in order to get through life, but this only seemed to make things worse, and it also seemed to prejudice the overhearers against me. Eventually, I relented, and I said I would do as had come to be expected of me, and this immediately resolved the situation, with the onlookers apparently all satisfied and everyone getting back to work.
The following day, I received a message from management wondering whether I would like to have a follow-up meeting regarding my raise. I ignored the message and forgot about it the best I could, but the next day, I received the same message, which I also ignored, though with some difficulty. I next received an email invite to a meeting with management, which was scheduled for the following week, but I did not check myself off as attending, and the following morning, the email program reminded me of this need to confirm my attendance. The next day, the email program limited my features until I made this confirmation, but I still had enough abilities to successfully get through my work for the day. The following morning, a note was taped to my computer screen, and it bore the message: Meeting today, first thing after lunch.
I did not know what to do other than quit the job, which I did by email, noting the fact that my leaving the company could be considered as effective whenever, so long as before lunch. Then, I spent a few minutes gathering my things, and I was just starting to say my goodbyes to all the people I had worked with when the office assistant walked into the room. I could see tears in her eyes, though they were much fainter than previously, and it was obvious that she wanted no one to notice their presence. Loudly, with a near yell that trembled throughout, she informed me that she was officially escorting me from the premises, though security could, if required, come to her assistance.
I answered that I was on my way out, but she repeated, in the same voice, that she was officially escorting me from the premises, though security could, if required, come to her assistance. She walked with me all the way out to the parking lot, and she did not herself go back inside until I got in my car, started it, then drove away. In my rearview mirror, the last thing I could see of the place where I had worked was her still glaring at me.
This was an experience that I felt I learned a lot from.
Mr. Nathans hails from a number of places in the Midwest. He now lives and works in Miami, Florida.